At least that is what you will tell yourself. Days go by, you are still, and emotional wreckage, an empty shell with dislocated limbs.
The footage will go in your head, over and over and over, until it just stops. Then, you will start to miss it because that is the only routine you are used to now. You will keep asking yourself what have you done wrong, what have you done to deserve a shit load of crap over you. No one will know the answer. You will never find out.
It will go away they say, and you want to believe each and every one of them. You are a pessimist from birth, those words to not creep any comfort into your skin. Maybe for a little while, you will believe. The sheer power of ones will.
In realiti, no one knows how you feel. In realiti, there are a lot of people in the world just like you. The hurricane of emotions is always around. It’s hard to escape.
Every day you put on a fresh face and no one knows. It makes you think no one cares, and it might be true. But there is always someone there for you, all you need to do is look and keep looking. Your search should not be over after the first hurdle.
It’s a struggle. Constantly. You didn’t choose this. You don’t deserve it, as does no one. It’s just the way it is.
The pain, the sorrow, the burden. No one deserves this.
You will survive. Speaking from a personal point of view, I have survived a lot of ship no one should ever face. It kept going and going, but, I survived. We all do survive in the end.
People are evil and you just have to accept it. They will try to hurt you and they will succeed. That is no reason to let them.
Push them away. Don’t let them. They will go away, at some point.
Happiness is there for you too, just believe in it. It doesn’t hurt forever.
In the end, believe the people that have told you that it gets better. That is just a part of life.
Help others. Reach out to them. You are not alone in any of this.
Never close your eyes to the injustice, the pain, it will not go away.