You hold me tight, you spin me around, you influence my every move and every decision, you make me question my sanity and intelligence and times as well, you cruel bitch you…
You have a prerecorded path that I must take and give me no instructions what so ever to stay on it and you expect a perfect track record. For all of my slips and falls, you are to blame.
The reason I have no self-esteem, the reason I doubt if it’s worthy to live this kind of a life sometimes, the reason why I don’t have the courage to say what I want and do what must be done even though you expect me to do exactly that… For no self-worth, you are to blame.
The reason for my inevitable demise, the cause of my anxiety attacks and the root of all evil basically… you are responsible.
It’s much easier to cast blame than to take the blame for your own actions, there is always someone to blame.
But I have taken my fair share of responsibility for my own actions, or my inactions a lot of the times. There are a few things holding me back and you are definitely one of them. I wish you weren’t…
How does one overcome what’s written in the stars? If you have been dealt shitty can you just ask for a reshuffle?
I have not yet come to that table where they offered me that and I have reasonable doubt that I ever will. It’s not on my path.
Destiny is to blame. Life is to blame, and, to a certain extent, karma is to blame as well.
I might be slowly coming to terms with the way my life is progressing but that doesn’t make me feel a whole lot better on a daily basis. It is far faaaar from ideal but at least I tell myself that it could have been worse, and I am taking steps to make it more of my liking.